Be Strong

The other day, I heard a story about someone close to my heart. Let's call her R.

R married her husband S quite a few years ago, when I was a small child. She lived a life, that wasn't ideal but it wasn't bad either. Soon she had a baby girl and they lived well for a bit. During these years, S abused her verbally. Calling her names, saying she was worthless, etc. She left him and went to stay with her family but always went back to him. She had another baby girl and she may have thought that things would change now that they have two kids to take care of. But no. Things didn't change. Instead they got worse. A couple of days ago, he hit her, and threatened to throw acid on her face.

I think she finally had enough. She packed her things and left to go home. I don't know if she'll go back or she's call the cops, but I hope it's the latter.

My mum asked me this the other day after telling me this story. She asked, "I don't know if it's women who are less impatient, but she packed her things and left."

My reply to that was "It's not that women are less impatient ma, it's that in our generation, there is no stigma anymore if a couple is divorced. She doesn't have to worry about what people think, she has children to worry about and that's her first priority. Her husband is stupid to think that he can behave that way with her. She's less afraid, because people will always find out the truth."

Its so sad to hear that some people think that their loved ones are their property rather than anything else.

There's nothing that I can say to help her, except support her in what she does. I hope the number of people who behave like S decrease, and I hope people realise that you are strong enough to walk away. Don't worry about what people say. You are your first priority. If you are safe, then your family will be too.

There are always organisations that you can call for help in your country. Find out their numbers.

Be safe.

S

The Palace of Illusions

I finished reading The Palace of Illusions a couple of days ago and I absolutely loved it! Chitra Banerjee has taken the Mahabharat from an all male centered epic and shown it to us from the eyes of Draupadi.

If you do not know the Mahabharat story, it is the epic story of the Kauravas and the Pandavas (who are cousins) which leads to one of the most well known battles of all time - The Battle at Kurukshetra. When you read the Mahabharat, you read about all the men and their roles towards this battle. You don't hear much about the women. When I read this book, it gave insights to everything Draupadi went through her entire life from childhood, to her marriage of the five Pandavas brothers to the battle.

The way she has written this book makes you really lose yourself into the character. Draupadi is a powerful woman and is really stubborn in the way she thinks which, after reading this book made me realise that maybe I shouldn't be as stubborn as I am.

With this book and looking at it from her side of the story, I want to read the Mahabharat because this book doesn't delve so much into the past, before she was born. There are only bits and pieces of some stories and I want to know more about it.

Like I mentioned above, the one thing that I did learn from this is that sometimes it's not good to be stubborn. If Draupadi had let go of her anger and not been so stubborn, then maybe she wouldn't have influenced her husbands and the battle wouldn't have happened in the first place.

So yes, sometimes letting go of your anger and being less stubborn will help you in the long run. If the consequences of Draupadi's actions won't make you realise it, I don't think anything will.

S

Put on hold

So I know I said I'd read the Bhagvad Gita and blog on it, but it's been sitting on my bed side table hardly touched. Why? Because I've been so busy with a job and a half that I've had no time! Also, reading the first part of it was a bit hard to follow. Maybe it was my misconception that it was supposed to be like a story?

Anyways, I've decided that I'm going to put that on hold and read a book that is set in the Mahabharat. 

The Palace of Illusions is supposed to be the Mahabharat from a woman's point of view, essentially Draupadi. It is written in a story style so this could be a good transition to the Bhagvad Gita.

Hopefully I'll finish this soon and let you guys know what I think!

S

The Bhagvad Gita

Hi all,

Sorry I haven't posted in a while, my laptop is currently acting crazy and had to be taken in to get fixed so I'm using my brother's laptop in the meantime.

This post is going to be really short. I just wanted to let you guys know that I'm going to start reading The Bhagvad Gita.

There are 18 chapters and I'm hoping I'll take 3 weeks to finish it. I'll update you guys about everything I've learnt. This isn't me trying to be spiritual or trying to impose it on all of you. The reason I'm reading this is because of my curiosity after the story of Savitri Pooja. I think that I should know more about my culture as well as the stories behind it.

Wish me luck!

S

Colours of the rainbow

This article was brought to my attention from a friend of mine. After reading this, I was appalled. After living in a world where we fight for equality in all forms, there are still some companies who are completely oblivious to it?

How is it that in India where people are a whole range of "brown" and there is no skin colour to define us, a crayon company has decided to call a "shade of pink or peach" skin? How is that skin colour? Who has a skin colour of that specific shade? 

We live in a world where skin colours range from white, brown, black and yellow and people are not or at least should not be judged by it, and yet we still do that. 

I know some people that say that they want the "fair" or "gori" girls for their sons and some girls are being forced to use fairness creams to achieve that look. When we can change the mentality and live in a society where our skin colour can be accepted, I think that's a time where equality will start. 

Never look at someone because of their skin colour. Never judge a person by their skin colour. If we were all stripped of that, we'd be the same person inside. Remember that.

S

Savitri Pooja (Vat Purnima)

Yesterday was Savitri pooja. It is like the Oriya version of Karva Chauth, where women pray for the well being of their husbands. In other states such as Maharashtra, Gujarat and Karnataka, it called Vat Purnima.

I wasn't too keen to sit on this pooja because I obviously don't have a husband, but I was forced too and I was told that I would get a good husband if I participated. The second reason that I didn't want to sit is because I usually don't understand why we do certain rituals and I don't want to pray if I don't understand because I don't know what to do or ask for.

Just before the ritual however, I was told about why we celebrate Savitri pooja and the story intrigued me. Here is the legend behind Savitri pooja:

Satyavan was a woodchuck and was married to Savitri. His parents were blind so he was the breadwinner of the family. One day, he was really tired after a long hard day at work and said he would lie on Savitri's lap and take a nap. While he was napping, the Yamraj (the God of Death) came and said that he was going to claim Satyavan's soul. Savitri refused, saying that she was recently married and had no children at all. He refused and said that he had to take Satyavan's soul away as it was time. As he started to take away his soul, Savitri said that she would follow him. When Yamraj said that he was going down to hell, she said that she would continue to follow him there.

Yamraj walked the most treacherous paths filled with thorns, stones, glass and Savitri continued to follow him. After walking this treacherous path, Yamraj said that he admired her and would give her one wish that he would fulfill, except he would not bring her husband back. Savitri thought and asked for her in-laws to be able to see their grandson playing on a gold swing set. Yamraj gave her in-laws eyes so that they could see. He gave her a gold swing set with gold toys so that her grandson could play. When it came to granting the grandson, he realised that she had tricked him because her husband had to be alive for her to have a son, therefore Yamraj had to return Satyavan's soul to his body. 

S

Yeh Jaawani Hai Deewani

I'm grooving to Balam Pichkari right now after watching Yeh Jaawani Hai Deewani last night.

This is a movie that I think everyone has to watch. It's about family, love, being yourself, fulfilling your goals and above all your friends.

The movie brings together fours friends 8 years after a memorable trip and makes us look at where they are in life and how things have changed.

The reason I think everyone should watch it is because of the friendships and how they develop. We all have friends that we have lost touch with who used to mean the world to us. In this day and age, we all spend so much time worrying about our careers and where we want to be in 10 years, that sometimes we forget the relationships we had. 

I'm not saying that it's bad to focus on your career and be the best you can be, all I'm saying is that sometimes while doing that, you can forget the reasoning behind it. At the end of your life, when you look back upon it, are you going to remember all the money you made, or all the relationships you made?

When focusing on your life and seeing the world, we can forget the small things in life and miss out on the most important moments of the people that love you. 

It's not bad to sometimes take a deep breath and slow down. Sometimes you experience the best things at that moment.

S