All Stitched Up

She was so nervous. Her hands sweating, and her mind racing over and over again as to what she should say. This was one of the hardest things she had to do. She took the plunge and said it.
Telling someone how you feel is one of the hardest things that people do. I don't think it's about facing the rejection that may come along your way, which it may. I think it's more along the lines of the fact that you've been so vulnerable with someone. To tell them how your heart works. In a sense, that's what you're offering them and you're scared that instead of helping you protect it, or even giving it back to you, they'll destroy it.
This is why communication is so hard. Telling someone how you feel is seen as being vulnerable. But it's not. We live in a world where we are scared of being open with other people because we're scared that they'll use it against us. But telling someone how we feel only makes us stronger. It means that we're not scared. That we're not afraid. That we're confident that we can handle what's coming for us.
Think about it from the other person's point of view. Wouldn't you be happy if someone told you that they loved you? Wouldn't it make life easier if you knew what the other person was thinking, what they were feeling, what they wanted?
She was so scared because of her past, that she didn't want it to affect her future. She didn't want to tell him because she didn't want to give him a part of her heart. It wasn't whole. Her heart had been broken and stitched up many times. She was scared that it'd be broken and stitched up again. But only when she looked inside of her did she see that her heart was stronger than before. That these stitches were the reason she could offer a part of it to him. What had hurt her in the past, wasn't going to hurt her in the future.
"You don't get to choose if you get hurt in this world, but you do have some say in who hurts you."
And she didn't mind getting hurt by him, because she knew she could handle it.

Being Thankful

There are some people who enter your life for a second, some people come for a week and some stay forever.

Whether they are there to bring a smile to your face or have made you cry, they have helped shaped who you are.

This is a time to be thankful to everyone. Even those people that have hurt you and walked away. Why? Because they've made you stronger.

With your first hurt, you cry for days, for your second hurt, it'll be hours and soon you'll be so strong that even if people come and go, you won't let it affect you.

So be thankful. Not only to the people that stayed, but to the people that left as well. Because by leaving, they've made you become a stronger person and have helped you see the world in a different way.

Wear it loud. Wear it proud. Everyone has scars that no one can see and yet we all know it. So it's ok.
Thank them.

I know I do.

S 

Be Strong

The other day, I heard a story about someone close to my heart. Let's call her R.

R married her husband S quite a few years ago, when I was a small child. She lived a life, that wasn't ideal but it wasn't bad either. Soon she had a baby girl and they lived well for a bit. During these years, S abused her verbally. Calling her names, saying she was worthless, etc. She left him and went to stay with her family but always went back to him. She had another baby girl and she may have thought that things would change now that they have two kids to take care of. But no. Things didn't change. Instead they got worse. A couple of days ago, he hit her, and threatened to throw acid on her face.

I think she finally had enough. She packed her things and left to go home. I don't know if she'll go back or she's call the cops, but I hope it's the latter.

My mum asked me this the other day after telling me this story. She asked, "I don't know if it's women who are less impatient, but she packed her things and left."

My reply to that was "It's not that women are less impatient ma, it's that in our generation, there is no stigma anymore if a couple is divorced. She doesn't have to worry about what people think, she has children to worry about and that's her first priority. Her husband is stupid to think that he can behave that way with her. She's less afraid, because people will always find out the truth."

Its so sad to hear that some people think that their loved ones are their property rather than anything else.

There's nothing that I can say to help her, except support her in what she does. I hope the number of people who behave like S decrease, and I hope people realise that you are strong enough to walk away. Don't worry about what people say. You are your first priority. If you are safe, then your family will be too.

There are always organisations that you can call for help in your country. Find out their numbers.

Be safe.

S