I Promise

They walked together whispering to each other, making sure that the mothers didn't hear. She wanted to part her advice secretly. She knew that her friend was going through the same thing she was, just to a lesser extent. But she was young. It would have a toll on her. And so this is what she said: "The only way to be happy is to take out the negativity in your life. If you listen to the bad things that people say all the time, you will get depressed. You won't start liking yourself. I learnt this the hard way, and I don't want you to go through it. Some people are hypocrites, some people are just negative, there's nothing you can do. Just quietly listen, nod your head and run it through one ear and out the other. You control your happiness, no one else does. You are an amazing person. You are thoughtful, kind and caring and that's what matters most. At least your parents listen to you and respond in a more positive way when you told them how you felt. That's what matters. Don't listen to something you don't want to. You don't have to. Surround yourself with people who like you and your company. People who are positive. Life will become much easier. I say this from experience." She hugged her friend and as she left, whispered in her ear "It will get better, I promise".

The Invisible Women

This article shocked me in more ways that I can imagine. Maybe it's because I live abroad, or that I have lived a sheltered life. You could say that it's because I'm spoilt, but I never thought that being divorced, widowed, raped, etc. could condemn a woman to live the life that these "invisible women" live.
How is it that in a country where we all say that we are modern and forward thinking that someone who has been raped can't live a normal life and has to be shunned from society and looked down upon. Why is it that a woman who stood up for herself while living in an abusive relationship now has to live in a dingy room. 
These women did not choose their future and they are trying to move forward which itself is hard from the circumstances that they have been in and yet we as a society decide that we will not allow them to.
It's sad to think that mothers are abandoned, that wives are left and that victims are looked down upon. 
It's not difficult to wonder why these things happened in the first place instead of thinking that these women have committed a mistake. How hard is it to lend a helping hand? To help look after a single mother's child while she has to work? To offer up a room so that your mother can stay? To take in your sister or daughter so that she won't have to suffer in an abusive relationship.
After all, when we look after people, isn't that when society moves forward and becomes better?
No one should have to be invisible.
Everyone should be seen.

Thank you

I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday and because he helped me make a decision, I said “thank you”. When he told me not to, and that it was such a small thing, this is what I explained:

When you ask someone for help and they help you, they have chosen to help you. They can easily say no and go about their lives, but they chose to take time out and make your life easier. The fact that they do this makes me say thank you because I appreciate the help, even if it does happen to be that they get me a glass of water. They are not forced to help, but decide to do it from the goodness of their heart. The least I can do is say “thank you”. No matter who you are, you like to feel appreciated, and those two words can put a smile on someone’s face and make them feel like their time is worthwhile.

The reply to this was “but it was something so small”. To which I replied, “you have to remember, something small for someone can be big for someone else”.

So even if you have no new years resolutions, just remember that a simple thank you can change a person’s day.

And I sign off on 2013 with that.

Thank you. To all my family for helping me and putting up with me throughout this year. To all my friends for staying with me through my crazy periods. And to you. For taking time out of your day to read what I write. It’s like I said, you chose to read this, and for that I appreciate it.

S