I was not a positive person. Not that I was a pessimist, but I like to think of myself as a realist. I told myself that I would look at the worst so that I wouldn't be upset. But most of all, I allowed the outside world to determine how I felt on the inside.
Over the past year and a half, I have struggled internally to find out what happiness is and how I can achieve it. How do I make my days better and see the brighter things in life.
The answer wasn't about materialistic things. It was't whether I had the best clothes or a nice home. That did bring me happiness. But temporary happiness.
It was only after so many failed attempts that I began to see a pattern. It was the days that I choose to feel better that made me happier. The days that I realised that I didn't listen to the people that said that I was stupid or dumb or ugly.
I was the one that got to choose who I was. Whether I was the funny one or the smart one or the beautiful one. I got to define who I was and who I am.
I saw this TedX Talk recently and it really hit home. Lizzie Velasquez has been labelled as "The World's Ugliest Woman". She was bullied at every step and turn she made about the way she looked and now she's a motivational speaker, has two books under her name and has a documentary coming about about her life. She's a person who has turned bad situations into good ones and used the negativity to fuel her into becoming better at what she does.
If a person who has so much negativity in her life; a person who has been told to "do the world a favor, put a gun to your head and kill youself" can be so positive, what makes you think you can't?
Everyone has their own personal journey. Everyone has their own story. Everyone has their own insecurities. But only you can control how you feel. You can control what you think. You can choose who you want to be.
Be happy.
