Words stay in the heart

This past weekend, my parents and I got into a huge fight. Words were exchanged and doors were slammed. This is normal in every family, so why am I bringing it up?

It's because of the aftermath. Have you ever been in a fight where you try and remember what people have said and you just remember the negative things they've said about you?

People say that actions say more than words, but remember that words stay in the heart. Sometimes what you say out of anger can stay in the mind of someone else for long periods of time. Whether it's something as simple as "You're stupid" to "I hate you" to "You've ruined my life", you have to keep in mind the impact that it has on someone else.

I admit it, I've done it. I've said things out of anger that I sometimes wish I could take back, but that's the problem, you can't.

So many young men and women hear the negative things that we say and take it to heart. You can't help it, we're human. They magnify all the negative and live unhappy lives.

So just be careful what you say. They can either make or break someone's day and you'd rather be the cause of someone's smile than their frown.

And one last thing, never forget to tell someone you love them. People tend to forget that they are loved and we need to constantly remind them. Don't wait for the perfect moment, do it now.

S

Be Strong

The other day, I heard a story about someone close to my heart. Let's call her R.

R married her husband S quite a few years ago, when I was a small child. She lived a life, that wasn't ideal but it wasn't bad either. Soon she had a baby girl and they lived well for a bit. During these years, S abused her verbally. Calling her names, saying she was worthless, etc. She left him and went to stay with her family but always went back to him. She had another baby girl and she may have thought that things would change now that they have two kids to take care of. But no. Things didn't change. Instead they got worse. A couple of days ago, he hit her, and threatened to throw acid on her face.

I think she finally had enough. She packed her things and left to go home. I don't know if she'll go back or she's call the cops, but I hope it's the latter.

My mum asked me this the other day after telling me this story. She asked, "I don't know if it's women who are less impatient, but she packed her things and left."

My reply to that was "It's not that women are less impatient ma, it's that in our generation, there is no stigma anymore if a couple is divorced. She doesn't have to worry about what people think, she has children to worry about and that's her first priority. Her husband is stupid to think that he can behave that way with her. She's less afraid, because people will always find out the truth."

Its so sad to hear that some people think that their loved ones are their property rather than anything else.

There's nothing that I can say to help her, except support her in what she does. I hope the number of people who behave like S decrease, and I hope people realise that you are strong enough to walk away. Don't worry about what people say. You are your first priority. If you are safe, then your family will be too.

There are always organisations that you can call for help in your country. Find out their numbers.

Be safe.

S

The Palace of Illusions

I finished reading The Palace of Illusions a couple of days ago and I absolutely loved it! Chitra Banerjee has taken the Mahabharat from an all male centered epic and shown it to us from the eyes of Draupadi.

If you do not know the Mahabharat story, it is the epic story of the Kauravas and the Pandavas (who are cousins) which leads to one of the most well known battles of all time - The Battle at Kurukshetra. When you read the Mahabharat, you read about all the men and their roles towards this battle. You don't hear much about the women. When I read this book, it gave insights to everything Draupadi went through her entire life from childhood, to her marriage of the five Pandavas brothers to the battle.

The way she has written this book makes you really lose yourself into the character. Draupadi is a powerful woman and is really stubborn in the way she thinks which, after reading this book made me realise that maybe I shouldn't be as stubborn as I am.

With this book and looking at it from her side of the story, I want to read the Mahabharat because this book doesn't delve so much into the past, before she was born. There are only bits and pieces of some stories and I want to know more about it.

Like I mentioned above, the one thing that I did learn from this is that sometimes it's not good to be stubborn. If Draupadi had let go of her anger and not been so stubborn, then maybe she wouldn't have influenced her husbands and the battle wouldn't have happened in the first place.

So yes, sometimes letting go of your anger and being less stubborn will help you in the long run. If the consequences of Draupadi's actions won't make you realise it, I don't think anything will.

S